Back From the Dead: How to Clean Your Ski Jacket

The world is full of frights that the rational mind can’t reconcile with reality: cheese in a can, the zombie apocalypse, that ski jacket you left unwashed, dirt-covered and and reeking at the bottom of your gear closet.

While experts are quite unified in their classification of canned cheese food, zombies and abused ski jackets inhabit a purgatory of confusion. In the words of one zombie expert, “The undead are notoriously difficult to kill.”

But in the words of… well… us: “Old ski jackets are a piece of cake to revive.” Much like the Necronomicon Ex-Mortis, Nikwax can bring your (supposedly) deceased ski jacket back to world of the living. So without further ado, here is how to revive your gear:

1. For waterproof/breathable hard shells or soft shells without a wicking liner*: place the gear in the washing machine and fill with water at the temperature recommended on the tag (or simply warm- to be safe). Set your cycle to “regular” or “synthetics,” as determined by your washer.
2. Add Nikwax Tech Wash. In a top-loading machine, add three full caps for 1-3 garments or five full caps for 4-6 garments. In a front loader, it’s best to add no more than two garments with two capfuls of Tech Wash. Special note: If you live in an area with hard water, toss in an extra capful of Tech Wash. If you have an HE machine, use about half the recommended amount so you don’t suds up the place.
3. Sit back in your zombie bunker with a good book and a glass of wine/beer/hot cocoa as the machine runs its course.
4. More often than not, this single cycle will be enough to have rebuffed your ski jacket’s near death experience. If the old girl was in really bad shape, you may consider leaving it in the washing machine and running a second cycle. In the second cycle, replace Tech Wash with TX.Direct Wash-In waterproofing.
5. Follow the manufacturer’s instructions as to whether your garment should be line or tumble dried. Nikwax does not require heat for activation, so you’re good to go either way.
6. Put your jacket on; admire your kickin’ style in the mirror and grab a crow bar. Get outside and have some fun. Special note: The crow bar is for if you encounter a zombie and has nothing to do with your gear.

So long as zombies have human flesh to feast upon, they will survive. And so it is with your cold weather gear. So long as that coat gets a regular Nikwax bath, it will continue to be the well-working, warmth-giving waterproof undead of your closet.

*Wicking liner: a jacket lining that is intended to soak up your sweat. Usually fuzzy in texture.